"...What power can cause such fear?
There is a fire in your untried heart,
poor wretched girl! Dislodge it if you can!
I'd act more sanely, if I only could,
but this new power overwhelms my will;
reason advises this, and passion, that;
I see the better way, and I approve it,
while I pursue the worse."

If you have any interest in Greco-Roman mythology I would definitely recommend reading Ovid's Metamorphoses. He's a very clever writer. Also, strongly recommend the new translation by Charles Martin. He captures the essence delightfully. There are some really funny parts, and some exceptionally beautiful parts, but this chunk has just been pressing in my brain all day and I needed to write it our or something to try and dislodge it.

Every wondered why when most phan girls draw Erik they give him really lustrous hair? They have no problem with is facial deformities that make him look like a corpse, but heaven forbid he have male-pattern-baldness! Despite what they would like to believe, they're all still giving signs of the shallowness of which they accuse Christine.

Which also sort of pisses me off, come to think of it. Yes, Christine was frightened by his face. You know what else frightened her? The fact that this insane man had been living beneath the theatre for who knows how many years. And probably also that he had been obsessively stalking her, manipulating her, and controlling her. And it probably didn't help that he had a torture chamber, had killed a well-liked stage hand (and who knows who all else), and just violent tendencies in general. But you know what would probably scare me most if I were Christine? Oh, probably the part where, after she removes the mask, he starts screaming and wailing and cursing and dragging her around on the floor by her hair and then taking her fingernails and forcing her to dig them in to the flesh of his face and then drag them down until he was bleeding and then dropping to the floor and dragging himself on his belly in to the next room to weep.

I gatta say, being trapped in the deepest, darkest, reaches of the theatre where no one was ever likely to find m, in that particular situation just might be a bit of a turn off.

Just sayin'.

Don't get me wrong. I adore Erik and his story is my all time favorite horror/mystery/romance ever. But I've got to be realistic. And I HATE IT when people try to change the story. It's PERFECT. Candyfluff happy stories suck. But then, so do abismal, morbid, kill off all the characters stories. There has to be a balance and Phantom of the Opera has it.

Really, it's even debatable that it has a happy ending. They young, beautiful heroine runs away with the handsome, rich love of her life, of course. Which is a happy ending out of context. But the really happy part is that Erik learns to be human. It's heart-wrenching and tragic but his love for Christine finally transformed him from being a monster and a madman to being a poor wretched human in love. And when this happened, he was human enough to let her go. He loved her so much that he wanted to give her the life she deserved and he gave it to her. And that is the beautiful, happy tragedy of it.

Gosh. Seriously. One of the best story lines ever written.

Quick thing for fun before I get back to the stuff I'm supposed to be doing.

COUPLE THEMES-
Kate and Petruchio:
I Hate Everything About You- Three Days Grace

Hades and Persephone:
Snow White Queen- Evanescence

Jack and Bel:
With or Without You- U2
And/or
Blackout- Muse

THEMES-
Puck:
When you’re Evil- Voltaire

Erasmus:
I Get Around- The Beach Boys

Ove:
Your Sword Vs My Dagger- Silverstein

Me: Imaginary- Evanescence


I may or may not add more later.

When I occasionally post journal quizzes and crappy poetry, I can pretend like I'm not actually antisocial.

ONE - Spell your name without vowels: Mr 0_o


TWO - Are you single?: I was pretty much born a crazy cat lady

THREE - Whats your favorite number?: 5

FOUR - What color do you wear most?: probably black and white but I have been trying to branch out

FIVE - Least favorite color?: Orange. It used to be pink but I'm mostly getting over that. But orange is almost always ugly.

SIX - Favorite candy?: chooooooooooocolaaaaaaaaaate

SEVEN - What do you smoke?: Psh. When you're as hot as me you're always smokin' (but as to things that will damage my lungs and vocal chords I say EW NO!)

EIGHT - Are you happy with your life right now?: Yeah. More or less.

NINE - Anyone ever said you resemble a celebrity?: One time a guy tried to get on my good side by saying I looked like Angelina Jolie. I just laughed.

TEN - What is your favorite class in school?: Well, since I'm only taking one class that's not online right now, I'd have to say intro to academic writing.

ELEVEN - Do you shop at hollister/DC/Bluenotes?: don't make me gag.

TWELVE - How do you make money?: I'm a college student. What is this... money you speak of?

THIRTEEN - Who is your best friend?: Buttercup. That's what I named my laptop.

FOURTEEN - Where do you go to school?: Not sure that's your business.

FIFTEEN - Are you outgoing?: Only when I'm in costume.

SIXTEEN - One word to describe you?: anachronistic

SEVENTEEN - Favorite pair of shoes?: My blue, purple, and yellow striped stilettos ^^

EIGHTEEN - Do you own big sunglasses?: Yes. And I especially love to wear them with my giant, black sun hat. makes me look like an old-school celebrity.

NINETEEN - Where do you wish you were right now?: Austenland (I strongly recommend that book to anyone who likes or is even vaguely familiar with Jane Austen. It's delicious.)

TWENTY - What should you be doing right now?: doing homework, writing an essay, taking a test...

TWENTY ONE - Do you have a crush on anyone right now?: I like to think that I've gotten to old to have "crushes". I become besotted or perhaps "twitterpated". But the answer is still no either way.

HONEST SECTION:
Honestly, what's on your mind right now?: I wish I had some fruit but don't want to go buy any

Honestly, what are you doing right now?: procrastinating

Honestly, have you done something bad today?: haha! procrastinated

Honestly, do you watch disney channel?: Used to. Now I only have public t.v. But it doesn't matter. It all started going downhill after they stopped showing Even Stevens.

Honestly, who is the last person you talked to on the phone?: My brother

Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?: I'm female. When was the last time you met a female that wasn't jealous of someone?

Honestly, what makes you mad most of the time?: lies and liars.

Honestly, do you bite your nails?: Yeah... I can resist for several weeks, sometimes a month but then I bite them all off again.

Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment?: Lately it's been a constant struggle between my desire to be a hermit and my desire to be with people.

Honestly, are you keeping a big secret right now?: Secrets are almost as essential to human life as air.

Honestly, do you have a friend you don’t actually like?: *sigh* It's always a dangerous thing to rush into friendships.

THE CANS:
Can you blow a bubble?: Um... yes?

Can you dance?: poorly, but yes.

Can you do a cart wheel?: No, but I had a dream last night that I was trying to *shrug*

Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth?: Never tried. I'm generally to distracted by eating the cherries.

Can you whistle?: Yes

Can you wiggle your ears?: Nope. I've tried. It's a little depressing.

Can you wiggle your nose?: not without moving the rest of my face too.

Can you roll your tongue?: Yes.

Can you make a clover with your tongue?: Yes. It makes me feel special

ANGER SECTION:
What do you do when you’re mad?: bottle it up and let it fester, generally.

What’s the worst thing you’ve done when you were mad?: when I was little I would move all my furniture to barricade myself in my room and then draw mean pictures of whomever I was mad at

Ever made anyone cry when you were mad?: I can't recall. Probably.

CRYING SECTION:
Ever really cried your heart out?: Someone as melodramatic as me? You have to ask?

Ever cried yourself to sleep?: On occasion.

Ever cried on your friend’s shoulder?: Only when pets have died (and that's only because both times I was in the process of moving and had to bury their poor little corpses at friend's houses). Generally I prefer to hide it unless it's physical pain.

Ever cried over the opposite sex?: Not that I can think of. I've been upset by boys, of course, but I don't know that any have ever actually made me cry yet.

Ever cried over the same sex?: Yes, but not romantically if that's what you're implying.

Do you cry when you get an injury?: Again, drama queen.

Do certain songs make you cry?: Absolutely

Do certain movies make you cry?: HAHAHA! I even cry during comedies.

HAPPY SECTION:
Are you usually a happy person?: I'm pretty good at faking it.

What makes you the happiest?: eating hot chocolate cake that my mom just made

Does being with your friends make you happy?: If it didn't they would be pretty useless as friends now wouldn't they?

Do you believe in yourself?: an interesting question. I'll have to ponder this further.

Do you wish you were happier?: Everyone does. That's why we compulsively buy things we don't need, watch hours of mind-numbing television, eat excessively, and always pretend like everything is ok.

Is being happy overrated?: No. It's just something we search for in the wrong places.

Can music make you happy?: That depends on the song.

LOVE SECTION:
How many times have you had your heart broken?: It's still completely intact and hasn't even needed any repairs.

Have you ever loved someone so much that you’d die for them?: Again, not romantically, but yes.

Has anyone besides your friends and family ever said ‘I love you’?: No.

HATE SECTION:
Do you actually hate anyone?: A couple. But I've been trying desperately to forgive them and move on. It's just... hard.

Have you ever been on a hit list?: Haha! I don't know. Have I, Nicole?

Are you a mean bully?: I doubt it. I hardly even ever talk to people.

Do you hate George Bush?: No more than any other politician.

SELF ESTEEM SECTION:
Is your self-esteem extremely low?: Not extremely. I think I see my good traits and bad traits in a fairly balanced way.

Do you think you're good looking?: Plumply pretty.

Do you wish you could be someone else?: Nah. I like me. Most of the time.

LOOK AT ME:
What is your current hair color?: Chocolate

Current piercings?: needle-phobic

Have any tattoos?: again, needle-phobic

Straight hair or curly?: wavy

CURRENTLY WEARING:
What shirt are you wearing?: A purple low v-neck with an empire waist and a lacy brown undershirt

Necklace(s)?: A long string of pearls

Shoes?: I'm sitting comfortably at home. Who wears their shoes at home unless they have feet problems?

HAVE YOU EVER:
Hugged someone?: What kind of deprived life do you think I've lived?

Been on the phone until the sun came up?: No.

Laughed so hard you peed in your pants?: ... It was only a tiny, tiny, TINY bit!

Laughed so hard you cried?: OH yeah.

Got in a fight with someone?: fist fight? No.

THE LAST:
Person you talked to in person?: a girl in my choir

Person you talked to online?: ummmmm... I think it was when my mom sent me an email the other day because I had lost my phone and wasn't answering.

Person you hugged?: Can't recall. I think it was Carl.

RANDOM:
Do you like surveys?: No. That's why I'm taking one, idiot.

Do you get along with your parents?: Yes

Do you have mental breakdowns?: define a mental breakdown...

CURRENT:
Current mood: listless

Current music: none

Current hair style: long with sexy/mysterious bangs that hang below my eyebrows

Current crush: None.

Current thing I ought to be doing: I'm pretty sure I already said.

Current windows open: I'm paranoid and generally keep all windows and doors closed and locked when I'm alone.

Current desktop picture: some sort of bamboo forest thing. Still need to change it.

THE DIDS:
Did you ever get into a fist fight in school?: Nope. Unless punching Carl counts.

Did you ever run away from home?: Yes, but I was, like, four and was back within ten minutes

Did you ever want to be a doctor?: Needle. Phobic.

Did you ever want to be a fire fighter?: Oh, probably.

THE DO'S:
Do you know how to swim?: Yes.

Do you like roller coasters?: ehhhhh... sometimes? I like getting OFF of roller coasters.

Do you own a bike?: Nope.

Do you think you could handle the stuff they eat on those reality shows?: If they were ABSOLUTELY going to pay me a million dollars, yes. If it was a contest and I didn't know for certain I would get the money then no.

THE DOES:
Does hair loss run in your family at all?: Yup. That's ok. I like hats and wigs.

Does your car get good gas mileage?: Oh yeah. It's like magic. I love my car.

Does your family have family picnics?: I dunno. Sometimes.

THE HAVES:
Have you ever been on a plane?: Yes

Have you ever been to the ocean?: Once

Have you ever painted your nails?: Yes

THE HOWS:
How tall are you?: Ummmm... more than 5 feet less than 6?

How much money do you have on you right now?: Again. What is this money you speak of?

THE LASTS:
Last person you hung out with?: My choir

Last thing someone said to you?: "See ya."

Last thing you said out loud?: "Heck freaking yes! I love this show! Haha... eyebrow."

THE WHATS:
What are you listening to?: the thrum of the AC

What is the weather outside?: Hot, humid, and refusing to rain even though the sky has been completely clouded over for three days.

What radio station do you listen to?: *shrug*

What was the last restaurant you ate at?: Dairy Queen I think...

What was the last thing you had to drink?: Water.

What was the last movie you watched?: Shakespeare in Love ala youtube

did NOT tag me. Therefore, I was inclined to do this.

Here are the rules:

{1}.Post these rules
Check.

{2}.Each tagged person must post 8 things about themselves on their journal.
Right-o.

{3}.At the end you have to choose 8 people to tag, and post their icons on the same journal.
Screw you.

{4}.Go to their page and send a message saying you tagged them.
Heck no.

{5}.NO tag-backs.
Very well.


1. I think licorice flavored gum is completely wrong.
2. Mustaches are the anti-sexy unless you happen to be Westley.
3. Not even the Goblin King can pull off a mullet. They're worse than mustaches.
4. I've lately become very fond of goatees and short scruffy beards.
5. And every time I think about it I feel the need to quote Beatrice from Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing: "He who has a beard is more than a youth, and he who has no beard is less than a man. And he who is more than a youth is not for me and he who is less than a man... I am not for him."
6. I've lately become obsessed with the "smokey-eyes" look and have started wearing WAY too much eye makeup.
7. My mom bought me gummy vitamins to take with me to school because she knows I won't take the pill kind. They are delicious. I'm afraid I may over-dose.

and finally, without further ado,

8. I. Like. Chocolate. Milk.